Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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