Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
