last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
