whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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