I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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