I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
