What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
