You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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