discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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