I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
