If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
