marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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