Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize