I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
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