we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
