I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
