I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
