I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
