I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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