i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
