shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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