the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
