: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
