JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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