Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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