I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
