i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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