He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Randomize
