we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
