I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
