If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize