You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
