Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
