quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
