So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
