Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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