with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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