His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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