I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
