the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
