He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
