the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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