someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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