I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize