I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
