haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
