just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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