Dual....:-)
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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