You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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