I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I need moral support for this bender
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize
